Three years ago, according to Facebook memories, our son (finally) got his autism diagnosis. He was 13 years and 11 months. The process took 3.5 years. I have blogged about it before, so I won’t go over that again (although if you’re interested, scroll back through past posts) but compared to some, that was a quick process. The NHS is overworked, and CAMHS and Children’s Services even more so, so I am grateful that our tenacity as a family and our son’s pushing to get the diagnosis he knew he had, got us to the 15th October 2018 and we had confirmation of what we had known all along.

Getting a diagnosis doesn’t suddenly make everything fall into place – we still battle, advocate and educate – but for our son it worked as a lens, so that people could see him rather than his mood, his mask, his scowl or his reluctance to get involved. For him, it has been a hugely positive thing, and he embraces his neurodiversity and his amazing mind, as does our older son with his ADHD.

I have blogged countless times about battles, wins, moods and so many other things, and I do acknowledge that there are many parents of neurotypical children who have been through the same. I blog when we have wins, I blog when we have bad times, and I blog when my mood necessitates me putting my feelings into words and sharing with you all.

Today, however, I am blogging to tell you that it can be ok. That there is a place for everyone, and when we find that place, the troubles don’t go away, but they get easier to manage. The summer GCSE results brought us the grades we were expecting; excellent grades in sciences and maths, ok grades in both English qualifications (and he got above the magic 4 so has level 2 English) and the other subjects were in the middle. This was an fantastic achievement, even more so as he is in the cohort of 2021, and it’s all down to his mantra of ‘work smart, not hard’.

He is now doing A-levels in biology chemistry and maths, as well as an EPQ which will centre around genetics. We had parents’ evening on Tuesday and it was amazing – not bragging parent amazing, but really amazing! He has found his place, and he fits perfectly. What mattered more than the glowing reports from the teachers, however, was that dyslexia, autism and anxiety weren’t mentioned at all. There was no ‘this is really good, but there’s an issue with spelling/organisation/processing/whatever’. He is doing really well. That’s it – period, full stop, end of sentence. He doesn’t need coping mechanisms, he doesn’t need to break down or overcome barriers, he doesn’t need anything more than his work printed on purple paper, because he is in the right place doing the right subjects, and it’s fabulous. This is how education should be – students taking subjects that inspire them, that they enjoy and that are delivered in a fully accessible way.

All students have a place – be that sciences, arts, vocational courses, humanities, music, sport, for example. When they are on the right course and being taught in the right way, things start to fall into place. A-levels aren’t right for everyone, and neither are apprenticeships, B-Techs, T-quals or NVQs, but there is something out there for everyone, and if we help them to find it, it really can be ok.